I don't know if what she has did is right. But even if I know and it's not, I'm last in the line to tell her just that.
I'm in no position to even comment on what she's doing.
And all I can do now is to hope that she's making a right decision and she'll be happier, more loved.
It's almost entirely certain that that'll be the case; but what if it's not? Even if I want to warn her about it, I can't.
Not even as a friend.
I've known her so well, I should have been the one making the decision for her like the so many times I've did before; like what I did on all the previous break ups. Let me make the decision, for you, for me; for us.
But maybe I haven't, for the so many times I've made a decision, it's a wrong one.
And for she eventually left without my opinion.
Maybe she's just as I've said, not careful when making decisions, and that's why we've ended up like this.
Blaming her is the last thing I'd do, but maybe at that point of time, 7 years back, when that very decision was made, it had proved to be a mistake; or rather, it proved mistakes.
Or maybe at that point of time, few weeks ago, that decision was then a wrong one. But of course I'll think the former holds more relevance, like what she would believe as well. But what if one day we realize the latter is true, like what we've done for the past few times?
Will we still try to pursue the apparent happiness that we once thought were so tangible, or will we finally have the strength to become sober and mark an end to it?
Search me, even my soul have no answer to it.
