I've always had the excuse that birthday is just another day in the year and there really isn't anything to celebrate about. But I realize it's juat the childish me refusing to acknowledge the reality that the world doesn't revolve around me. What if no one turns up?...
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I ain't exactly a bitch who seeks everyone's attention and cuts myself when I fail to do so but I really do enjoy the limelight (or, putting it nicely, the love). I don't deny that it's not always a good thing; "what an egoistic snob" followed by an eye roll is probably the first reaction people have for someone who constantly seeks to be the center of attraction ("you're not the sun!" is quite cute too).
Maybe it's a last-child syndrome; maybe it's just a personality flaw... Perhaps, I should stop thinking of myself as the main character in this real-life role-playing game fantasy of mine (I'm not the only one with this thought though, it's a philosophical existential question).
But I've been trying to grow out of it, at least bit by bit (hey, I've been throwing parties every year since army times! Haha). And I'm thinking this exchange experience is really forcing me to get out of this particular comfort zone of mine.
Perhaps a solo trip will help...
